Marco Materazzi is after your sister

September 5th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

You might remember Marco Materazzi. As this video patently illustrates, he is a crazy, crazy bastard.

Well, he’s back, talking in a little more detail about exactly what it was that got Zidane so fired up that the midfielder figured it was a good idea to headbutt another human being in the chest in the closing minutes of the fucking World Cup final.

As you might imagine, it involves the sister. Dude, not cool:

“We both spoke and I wasn’t the first. I held his shirt but don’t you think it is a provocation to say that ‘if you want my shirt I will give it you afterwards’?”I replied to Zidane that I would prefer his sister, that is true. I brought up his sister and that wasn’t a nice thing, that is true,” said Materazzi. “Thankfully there are tens of footballers who could confirm that much worse things are said on the field,” added the Inter Milan defender.

If that’s all that was said, I’d be really surprised. Let’s say, just for the sake of argument, that all Materazzi really said was a quick little “Yeah, your sister” quip. Not to drop childhood/high school sports experience as a qualifier here, but Materazzi is right. Worse stuff gets said all the time. I think I heard worse things than that in my U-12 games as a kid, and I know I heard worse things on the high school pitch. Much worse things. Things that would make your ears bleed, things about dead babies and grandmothers and the racial makeup of certain Iowa towns. I’m not proud of it; it was high school. I’m not really proud of anything I did in high school. But nobody was headbutting anybody then, either. Even the really terrible teams, the boarding school squads with two or three girls we always played in the first round of the playoffs - no headbutts. And they would have had every right, as far as I’m concerned.

Zidane, though, didn’t have the right. Not if the only thing he caught was a sister joke. Which, knowing Marco Materazzi, probably isn’t even the tip of the iceberg. It’s tough to say.

Unfortunately, we’ve been left where we started - with a beautifully ludicrous video and little to explain its reason for existence. Which, for the most part, is OK by me.

Case of the Mondays: Yanks movin’ on up

July 17th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

Baseball:

The Yankees swept the White Sox this weekend, moving them within a half-game of the AL East-leading Boston Red Sox. It was the first time the White Sox were swept all season. Mariano Rivera picked up the 400th save of his career Sunday, becoming the fourth-ever pitcher to do so. He’s 36 years old, which has to be a lie. He’s at least 50. Four other clubs also enjoyed a weekend sweep.

Not a single save was recorded on Saturday in the MLB, for the first time in almost 28 years. Six pitchers blew saves. Awesome work, guys.

NFL:

Cowboys safety Keith Davis was shot early Sunday morning on a Texas highway during a drive-by shooting. His condition is currently listed as stable. Here’s to a speedy recovery.

Barbaro Death Watch:

Things still aren’t looking so good for the winner of the Kentucky Derby. Pray for Barbaro, everybody.

Soccer:

Another Zidane video for your enjoyment. Fidel Castro is in this one!

Sightings :

One of our buddies saw Bulls coach Scott Skiles at Nick’s English Hut over the weekend. Apparently, Scottie got worked over in “sink the biz.”

Snoop Bloggy Blog:

Carl Monday, you sunofabitch! [Deadspin]

Paul Shirley is back with a vengance, baby. [Shirley’s Journal, ESPN]

Jesus Christ, Sports Superstar. [I Dislike Your Favorite Team]

OK - just one more post, I promise

July 13th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

Alright, OK, I get it. I’m beating the Zidane thing to death. I’m head-butting it into submission. I understand.

Just one more post, OK? This game is too good to pass up.

Yes, that’s a game where you enact a bunch of head-butts on people, acting as Zinedine Zidane. It’s pretty awesome. I saw it at the Big Lead, which is also pretty awesome.

Go forth and do it. And expect no further Zidane discussion today.

We may never know. Sigh…

July 13th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

In case you haven’t been following along, I’ve become slightly obsessed with the whole Zidane-Materazzi blowup. What can I say? When you see a man drop another with a head to the chest, it’s not something you can unthink easily. It must be pored over and worked through until a logical conclusion can be reached.

Unfortunately, Zidane had his chance to tell the world last night what was said, but refused. Well, he didn’t actually refuse - he just didn’t get into any detail:

“I was very seriously provoked,” said the 34-year-old French football captain, adding that Materazzi “said very hard words about my mother and my sister. I tried not to listen to him but he kept repeating them”.Zidane’s mother is reported to have been ill and taken to hospital in the run-up to the match. The Italian player repeated the insults “two or three times” and the third time Zidane reacted, he said.Sometimes words were harsher than actions and he would rather have been “punched in the mouth” than subjected to insults like that.But Zidane did not spell out what the “very serious” insults were.

Come on! At least give us something. OK - so your mother and your sister were involved, and he tweaked your nipple. Not cool, obviously. But you’re the only one that can set this straight! Like three different lip readers say Marco said like three different things! We need to know! Pleeeaase! You’re almost making Materazzi look, um, like a nice guy here:

Materazzi made a statement of his own, saying: “I didn’t mention anything about religion, politics or racism. I didn’t insult his mother. I lost my mother when I was 15 years old and still get emotional when I talk about it. Naturally, I didn’t know that his mother was in hospital but I wish her all the best.”

Alright. So we may never know what the insults were or whether they were that severe at all. But man. That head-butt. It will live on forever.

Also, in case you were wondering, Materazzi is kind of a bastard on the field. Check this video if you don’t believe. Gangsta.

Lest you forget, I am not cultured. I am a complete moron lacking any intelligence whatsoever. Got it? Thank you.

July 11th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

The dust has yet to settle on the whole Zidane headbutt situation - oh, you hadn’t forgotten already, had you? - but the reason why Zizou flipped his shit seems to be gradually surfacing, and it’s not looking good for everyone’s favorite trash-talker, Marco Materazzi.

First, yesterday, it was rumored that Materazzi called Zidane a “dirty terrorist.” Materazzi denied saying anything of the sort, claiming he was “ignorant” and didn’t know what the word terrorist meant. Dubious.

Today is a bit more of the same, as the Guardian rustled up some Italian lip readers - seriously - who seem to think Zidane heard “I wish an ugly death to you and all your family…go fuck yourself.”

Eesh. Though that seems like the most cumbersome bit of smack-talk in recorded history, it probably wouldn’t be the most effective. Certainly not worthy of a vicious chest-high headbutt, for sure.

Marco certainly isn’t doing himself any more favors today, admitting an insult but claiming it as innocent. His latest quote? A gem:

Materazzi, 32, told Gazetta dello Sport: ‘I held his shirt for a few seconds only, then he turned to me and talked to me, jeering.’He looked at me with a huge arrogance and said, ‘If you really want my shirt I’ll give it to you afterwards’. I replied with an insult, that’s true.’Materazzi has not elaborated on what he did say, but one report suggested he responded with: ‘I’d rather take the shirt off your wife’.

He has denied, however, some of the more vile insults referring to his wife or sister or calling him a terrorist.

‘It was one of those insults you’re told dozens of times and that you tend to let fall on the pitch.
‘I did not call him a terrorist. I am not a cultured person and I don’t even know what as Islamist terrorist is.’

He added: ‘For me the mother is sacred, you know that.’

I am not a cultured person. I don’t know what an Islamist terrorist is, nor do I understand the geopolitical issues inherent in Zidane’s existence in France as the child of Algerian parents. Also, I don’t understand the difference between fantatical religious extremists and common Muslim religious pedogogy and the complexity of viewpoints that occupy the middle-ground between the two. I have never read ‘No God but god,’ or anything by Henry Kissinger. Also, I am relatively clueless about the murky nature of Italian foreign policy and the difficulty in seperating Italian identity with Italian race. All of these issues mean nothing to me; I never discussed them in my education. I am not cultured. Thank you.

Also, you know, for me - the mother is a’sacred! Mama Mia!

OK, Marco. Whatever you say. (Or don’t say.)

Your World Cup Final Picture Book

July 10th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

While scouring the AP for a World Cup picture to package with the post below this one, I found a ton of fan reaction shots (like the one of these French fans above) and some other pretty phenomenal pictures. So I thought, hey, why not share them? Peep some pictures after the jump, including one of Zidane walking by the World Cup Trophy as he left the stadium shortly after his fratty-Tau Tau Tau headbutt. It’s worth a look.

Also, with so much talk going on about Zidane, I feel I need to give some props to my favorite player in the land of futbol, Thierry Henry. The dude not only made the World Cup Final with France, but played in the Champions League Final with Arsenal back in May. Although, he lost both matches and didn’t score in either. But hey, how many championship soccer matches in Europe have you been a part of? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

CONTINUE READING THIS POST –>

The greatest smack ever talked

July 9th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

No, that’s not a video of Jamie on Cold Pizza the other day, though that would be cool too. No, fortunately, this is the video of Zidane flipping his top in the World Cup. As you probably know, Italy won on PK’s.

Without getting into it too much (this is the weekend after all, I’m not supposed to be blogging), something crazy had to have been said. Something so insane, so offensive, so ‘I’m going to do terrible things to your family you (insert racial epithet here)’, as to have caused Zidane to do that. Watch as he wheels around and goes straight for the chest. Whatever it was, it had to have been the greatest bit of trash-talk in recorded history.

I mean, with the exception of Marcelo Balboa, how many things actually make you want to slam your head into another man’s sternum?