My Monday, in video form

June 2nd, 2008 | Posted by PostmanE

Ah, life. It’s a motherfucker. Sometimes you have lots of time to blog, and sometimes it’s Monday and you spent all weekend drinking and you are stuck playing catch-up and you have literally nothing done, nothing, and so you just Google “Nut Shot” and click the first thing that pops up.

And then that video is a visual demonstration of your life. I wouldn’t call it providence, so much as the universal nut-kickerry of Monday morning.

Posting may or may not be light the rest of the day. Apologies. I’m sure you’ll get over it.

Revenge nut shots are the best kind

April 17th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

Because I feel as if I’d be doing you a disservice if I didn’t at least throw one set of moving pictures at you today — here’s a Postmen staple, the nut shot.

And this isn’t just any nut shot. I’ll let the YouTube user description explain:

This guys best friend Dave apparently tried to sleep with his sister so hes serving him a nice warm can of soup…to the nuts. At least now if he does eventually sleep with your sister she wont get pregnant.

The setup on this video takes a while as far as nut shot videos go. But, it’s worth the wait. Trust me on this one.

And remember kids: never mess around with your best friend’s sister or you will get a swift soup can to the nuts.

Early Weekend Fun: Sorry, but we are SOOO out of here

March 9th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanE

R and I are about to hop in my car and make the northward trip to the Big Ten Tournament, and since last night was a drunken mess, I had neither the time last night nor the ability this morning to do anything resembling sports observation/analysis.

Anyway, I write to apologize for this post’s lack of redeeming value. Also, I write to let you know: keep an eye out for some on-site stuff from the United Center in Chicago. I had the privilege of covering the national title game last year; I’ll probably try to duplicate that effort as far as postseason play will take us this year.

So yeah … sorry. As my penance, I give you this:

Never has a nut shot been administered - or received - with such enthusiasm. See you soon.

Thanks for punching us in the balls, coach

January 10th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

So did you hear about this Gregory Lynn Burr guy yet? Well, if not, let me fill you in.

He’s a 28-year-old former boys basketball coach in Colorado who allegedly – allegedly - punched his players in the nuts, showed them gay porn and pictures of penile-ily defunct men off his home computer. (Quit looking at your screen like that, it’s perfectly normal. Isn’t it?)

Here’s my favorite part of the story from the Colorado Springs Gazette.

One student sought medical attention for a groin injury he attributed to the coach’s strikes and later had scrotal surgery. Other students told police the strikes to the testicles were “the kind of hits that made you lay down” or “made you stop for a minute to catch your breath.”

And another gem:

A student said Burr would ask them, “What is the capital of Thailand?” When they would answer “Bangkok,” he would hit them in the groin.

Looks like we have a ball-punching comedian on our hands here.

If anything, Coach Punchintheballs gives me an excuse to post up another nut shot video. (Thanks Greg!)

Here’s a clip of a guy in the Sydney Olympics getting racked by a pole vault. Which I imagine is probably just as – if not more – painful than repeated punches in the groin from your basketball coach.

(For a post about someone who should probably be punched in the groin for good reason, head over to Fleece the Pig, Flog the Pony.)

Well, since we’re keeping it highbrow…

November 9th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

Here’s a couple of videos of people getting hit in the balls! Big Postmen thanks to Joel Pryzbilla for provoking all of this nonsense! Off we go…

The first is actually sport-related - it comes during a martial arts demonstration of some sort and, in my opinion, is beautiful in its subtlety.

The second is its polar opposite. Whereas I sort of pity the karate dude, I don’t feel one sliver of understanding for our friend down below here. Just watch - you’ll see.

Stay classy, dumbass. (Yes, the person that just posted two Youtube videos from the Search Results “Groin Shot” just told someone to stay classy. So what?)