So what, PostmanR played NES with Bird

October 16th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

Bill Simmons went ahead and played a little Tiger Woods PGA Tour ’07 with T. Woods himself. Of course Simmons lost in the few holes he was able to play against Woods, because, well, it’s Tiger Woods and he never loses to anyone, especially some dude who goes by The Sports Guy.

Well, remember that old NES game, Jordan vs. Bird? It had the 3-point contest, the dunk contest and the one-on-one mode? Well, yeah. I played with Larry Legend a few years back. True story.

Here’s what transpired:

PostmanR: Larry, why aren’t you in the slam dunk contest? Only Jordan is, what gives? And why can’t I complete any dunk? This game is frustratingly hard.

Larry: I like Mario a lot. And the princess.

PostmanR: In the 3-point contest, it looks like you’re shooting with one hand. Did you shoot with one hand when you played in the league?

Larry: No.

PostmanR: Then why do you shoot with one hand in the game?

Larry: You know, I sell cars now. I also am involved in with the Pacer organization. I am the president of basketball operations.

PostmanR: Oh, cool. So what’s the deal with the court in Jordan vs. Bird? It seems like it is indoors, but then there’s a brick wall in the back. Is it some sort of futuristic indoor/outdoor court hybrid?

Larry: One time I challenged Reggie Miller to a half court shot contest. They should make that into a video game.

PostmanR: How bout that commercial for McDonalds with MJ. Wasn’t it a horse game where you bet Big Macs or something? What was that like?

Larry: Big Macs are tasty. I also like quad stackers at Burger King. Did you know I have my own brand of wine?

PostmanR: OK, I think we’re done here.

Superman, suddenly vulnerable

June 29th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

It’s a visual thing. I know that. It only has so much relation to reality - such is the nature of sight. It’s a rudimentary observational tool.

But damnit, age makes me sad as hell sometimes.

There he was, Michael Jordan, towering over Rachel Nichols on draft night like he towers over so many other average humans. Trademark bald head, thick, trimmed mustache. All there. The MJ we remember. The Air Jordan we love.

But last night, in the midst of highlights full of 20-year-olds with sinewy features and limitless athletic ability, stood a guy that looked, for all intents and purposes, every bit the middle-aged man. He’s gained weight. His face is slightly wrinkled, his demeanor meek. He just seems…old. MJ seems old, and man, does that hurt.

He defined my childhood. Seriously. Knowing I’m not alone in throwing this out there, often, when talking about sports or life or anything else, Jordan was the only thing my father and I agreed on. Father and son, in unison: Greatest player of all time. Yep. I know, Dad. We watching the Bulls game tonight? Sounds good.

The he retired, and that was OK. I didn’t understand the nature of the business then, but I figured if MJ wanted to play still, he could. He just didn’t want to, and who were we to tell him what to do?

Unlike many others, I was even OK when he decided to come back, knowing he would never be the same, but wanting a little bit more video, a few more Jordan moments to pack away. He was old then, too, but not like this. And I was still in high school, still impressed by the lessened frequency of mind-blowing moments. He still felt larger than life, then, like he was a gym teacher messing around with the younger kids for fun, occasionally holding the ball up with one arm while the boys jumped up and down around his legs, unable to reach where he held the game. He could turn it on whenever. He was Michael. He was not bound by age or physical limitation.

Now he just seems human. Mortal. Like most middle-aged fathers, whose sons have come of age, suddenly vulnerable. Imperfect. Possibly just, well, wrong sometimes (Wizards, anyone?).

It’s probably only half true. MJ is still probably better at basketball, even at his age, than 98% of the 6 billion human beings left on the planet. He’s probably just as intimidating as ever with sneakers on, in the gym, shooting hoop after hoop after hoop. And he probably sees the game better than most people alive, sees players’ faults and their strengths like few else can.

But it sure doesn’t look that way. I guess that’s the unfortunate side effect of sight. It makes things harder to see sometimes.

For now, at least, I’m hoping that’s the case.

Skip Bayless chimes in on the ‘next MJ’

May 8th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

After numerous commenters (and by ‘numerous’ I mean three) blasted me for my LeBron James comments last week, I felt it necessary to respond in a post. Because, well, the detractors (if they even ever come back to this site) will be more likely to see this post then to dig back through the site and look up the comments under the LeBron post from last week.

And I think, barring injuries and if he gets a few championships under his belt, he will be perhaps THE best of all-time.

Dictionary.com defines the word perhaps as ‘maybe; possibly.’ So, yeah, nowhere did I say he was better than MJ right now, just that if he wins a few titles there’s a good chance he will mentioned right up there with Jordan, PERHAPS even better than him after all is said and done.

And yes, commenter Romes, Steve Kerr is right. The Cavs do look a lot like the late 80’s Bulls where everyone watched Jordan do everything. And once Jordan got good players around him, they were able to win championships. Which if LeBron gets teammates of the same caliber as Pippen etc., he’ll have an excellent shot at winning a few titles as well. In essence, all you are doing is strengthening my arugment.

Anywho, everyone’s favorite robot Skip Bayless just wrote a column about the whole ‘Next MJ’ thing in regards to Kobe and King James. After a bunch of whimsy rhetoric, he says Kobe has no shot at MJ’s throne and LeBron will never ‘quite be Jordan.’

Even with a solid first half by King James last night, the Pistons routed the Cavs 113-86. And no matter how good LeBron plays, it’s going to be insanely difficult to beat a team that actually plays defense (unlike the Wizards) and has a fluid and cohesive starting five.

But let us not forget it took MJ three tries before he got past Detroit.

(Also, due to lack of resources, I won’t be able to get my Derby video up until tomorrow. It’s worth the wait, trust us.)