Lawrence cops are your friends when the Jayhawks win the title

April 8th, 2008 | Posted by PostmanR

In my four years of college — yes, I made it out in four years! — I never got to celebrate a huge athletic accomplishment down on Kirkwood Ave. in Bloomington. (The soccer team won the National Title my freshman and sophomore year (thanks, o’day), but hey, this is America. And Indiana. Let’s not get carried away, people.) Two years before I arrived on campus, Mike Davis somehow got IU to the National Championship game and I’ve heard a whole array of stories: kids hanging from telephone wires, streaking, tear gas — sure seemed like a wild, fun scene. And there was similar debauchery when Indiana canned Bob Knight. (He’s turned out OK since then, it seems.)

But enough about lead-in personal anecdotes that serve no purpose, let’s check in on the scene at Massachusetts Street in Lawrence last night, shortly after Kansas took the title home:

Meanwhile, more than 250 police officers stood by as the game wound down.

“Kansas fans usually are pretty good at times like these,” said a Johnson County sheriff’s officer who declined to give his name. “I doubt we’ll have very much mischief, but you never know. A lot of people have been drinking a lot of beer.”

[ … ]

An hour after the game, the only visible police action occurred when a young man carrying three bottles of beer walked to up [sic] to three policemen and began to vomit.

“You’d better give me those,” one policeman said.

The young man handed him the bottles, apologized and began walking away. His girlfriend high-fived the policemen and told them, “Thanks for being nice.”

Excellent: No tear gas, no bloody riots, no looting — just some raucous celebrating and vomiting. I guess that’s what happens when you’re so drunk the only thing you can tangibly accomplish is screaming: “MARRRRRIOOOOO!”

{Via the Dagger. Also check out E’s work over at the Dagger today on the game. It’s quack-tastic.}

Ernest Hemingway reconfirms my thoughts about the Jayhawks

March 21st, 2008 | Posted by PostmanR

While E has graciously slurped Kansas’ collective nuts all season, I’ve yet to fall victim to their sheer athleticism. (Well , I suppose I have, just not to the degree he has. Also, the Jayhawks will probably be cutting down the nets in San Antonio because I’m writing this. So it goes.)

But finally, I’ve figured out what my problem has been with my aversion to the squad all year. As Ernest Hemingway tell us over at McSweeney’s today, never trust men from the plains.

I do not trust men from the plains. They have no beasts to hunt. They have no stormy seas to tame. They have no mountains to climb. There is nothing in their lives that tests their constitutions. Men without tests are not men. Coach Bill Self has shown this. In two of the last three years, he has been pistol-whipped by teams in the first round. That does not happen to real men. I have no strong opinion of junior guard Brandon Rush, but I doubt he could juke a marlin with his dribble. This team is left without honor in the first round.

Sadly, some of the same stuff herein could be said about Indiana right now. Although one time I swear I saw a bear, a sabertooth tiger and a deer walking through Dunn Meadow. You may say that was just that play they were staging and those were costumes; I will say that sabertooth tiger looked real and I was scared for my life.

The Postmen’s NCAA TE Part 2: Tourney leftovers

March 15th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

With E firmly entrenched on the Left Coast for the IU-Gonzaga game tonight and me firmly entrenched on my couch, I’m just going to roundup some stuff for you because, well, I can do that if I want.

Obviously, the Spin is doing its fair share of live-blogging today, as is WBRS Sports Blog and Awful Announcing. Those are always fun to ride along with, so if you’re feeling lonely, go make Internet friends in the comments.

Oh, also, I never made my NCAA picks. So consider this our NCAA Tournament Extravaganza: Part Deux, minus that image in the post below.

Final Four: Georgetown, Ohio State, Florida, Kansas

Wow look! Three No. 1 seeds! So, right there I’m probably already wrong. And as I just realized, this is the same Final Four E picked. (We’re like the same person!)

HOWEVA, I’m going with a different title game and champ. I see Florida regrouping quite well for this tournament. They have good point-guard play with Green, can shoot the trifecta with Humphrey and the Gators’ bigs are solid, as we all know. So, sorry Bill Self.

Second, although Ohio State has been crazy dominant all season, I don’t see them getting past Georgetown. The Hoyas seem more mature and more of a complete package to me. I could also be dead wrong in that assertion though, who knows.

So, I have the Gators vs. the Hoyas in the final bout, with Florida prevailing. After the game, Joakim Noah will do some lame dance, annoying millions. He will then go on to enjoy a mediocre NBA career, averaging 4.8 points a game, until he’s out of the league in seven years.

If something particularly peeks my interest during the games today, or if I find a YouTube video (a nut shot, of course!) then I’ll blog again today. If not, don’t expect again. It’s a holiday today anyways, right?

(By the way, Friday is our one-year anniversary. Hooray! We’ll write more about that tomorrow, hopefully.)

Who’s going to win this thing?: An IM conversation

March 13th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

There’s really no better way of conversing nowadays than through IM. Seriously, it’s perfect. Say someone IMs you that you don’t want to talk to, why, just ignore them. When you see them in public or at work or in class next, just say your Internet was messed or you “weren’t by your computer.” And if they don’t live in your immediate circle, you don’t even have to worry about it!

Can you do that if they’re standing right next to you? If they’re chatting their ass off in the break room, babbling on about Timmy’s soccer game over the weekend? Eff no. (Presumably, this some sort of logic could be applied to the telephone if you don’t answer, but for the purposes of this post, we’ll suspend that logic for now.)

Anyways, E and I conversed about what team might be crowned champion of the NCAA Tournament last night, and I’ve decided to republish it below for you. When Tim Hardaway doesn’t say he hates gay people, this is the kind of stuff I’m unfortunately going to have to throw at you. Apoligies. So, here’s the conversation, realitively the same way it happened live, minus all of E’s “LOLs” and “ROTFLs.” Man that stuff gets annoying after awhile.

R: if you’re going with a big ten squad, go with ohio state, not wisconsin
10:08 PM E: i have them winning it
i honestly think they can
R: yeah, i mean, they lost to florida at florida, nc at north carolina and wisconsin at wisconsin
that’s it
30-3
E: 30-3, all their losses AT 1 or 2 teams
GREG ODEN WITH ONE HAND
R: and lost arguably to the other three top teams in the country
E: yes
they are winning it
i’m convinced
10:09 PM R: i might go with them
but florida still intrigues me
10:12 PM E: yeah, it’s just hard man
i get the feeling they sort of lost focus down the stretch
10:13 PM R: but the can regroup and win
they won the SEC
E: and i’m (admittedly unreasonably) one those guys that sees the difficulty inherent in winning two straight titles and considers that to be more reason than matchups, etc
10:14 PM R: i mean, yes, that’s a good point
but at the same time, i’m of the mind where, if it hasn’t happened in awhile
then it could probably happen this year
what was it? 92-93 when duke won back-to-back?
10:15 PM it’s been a healthy enough amount of time in between for me, where, in my mind, it could happen again
E: yeah
that’s a good counterargument, and on the same terms
10:16 PM R: but again, that’s the same kind of rationale you could use with kansas
bill self hasn’t done dick in the tourney
he’s got a No. 1 seed now
they are a good team
who knows
E: right
R: so, they could maybe win too
E: damn
R: damn, this stuff is hard

Note: Expect a more coherent and complete set of picks later today. Actually, make that tomorrow.