Jay-Z’s Deshawn Diss: Meh

April 28th, 2008 | Posted by PostmanE

I wonder what Jay-Z does all day. I know he’s a business, man, but at some point his surrogates can handle the day’s workload — destroying Redman’s solo career can’t be that taxing — thus freeing up Jigga’s time for important non-retirement activities. Like golfing, or marrying Beyonce. Watching Scarface 50 times. And, of course, writing rap songs about Deshawn Stevenson.

Seriously: Deshawn Stevenson. We gotta get Jay-Z a new habit. This is mid-life crisis stuff right here.

Fortunately, it looks like Stevenson recognizes just how cool it is to be the subject of a mild-mannered, arena-friendly Jay-Z diss:

DeShawn, on the song: “That would never happen in Cleveland. I mean, if I even walked into a Cleveland club right now, I’d have two black eyes and I’d be on crutches. And they’d tell me I deserved it too. So, we’re boycotting Love. No loyalty….[Jay Z’s] worth about $500 million, and he’s writing songs about me? What does that say about DeShawn Stevenson? Ballllllling!”

As for the song, I give it a 5.5. A few good lines in there — something about Lebron not being paid enough — but for the most part it sounds like Jay-Z is as bored rapping about Deshawn Stevenson as everyone else is talking about him. Except me, of course, which is why I wrote this post. But now even I am sick of it, and thus likely to be the last blogger on Earth who dedicates any space to it. This is what it sounds like when stories die.

LeBron James might be coming out with a rap album

July 3rd, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

From the, “Wait, no way! A basketball player is doing a rap album?” file comes this bit of gossip out of the Miami Herald:

Cleveland Cavaliers star LeBron James was partying at The 400 Club at The Fifth on Friday night. According to a witness, James was in the VIP suite with some friends and teammates. He was also with music exec and urban marketing guru Steve Stout, because word is that James has an album dropping in the fall.

As friend of the Postmen Matt Watson points out today over at the FanHouse, we should have seen this coming, considering James is rocking out with a music studio in his new home.

I can only expect Jay-Z will guest on a few tracks, further solidifying that his career has gone to hell since he dropped the Black Album. You know, I would assume dropping a few verses on a LBJ album really isn’t um, too street.

{Via Sports By Brooks.}

Case of the Mondays: Dwight Howard ends games with one handed dunks. He can eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast to the chest. To Dwight Howard!

February 12th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanE

So football’s gone. Football? What’s football? As if we needed another reason to fully cast our glare on basketball, both professional and collegiate, Dwight Howard comes along and does something utterly … well, ridiculous doesn’t even begin to describe it.

You’ve likely seen the highlight a couple times by now (though my roommates hadn’t as of early Sunday); here’s the video anyway.

Ugh. Nasty. Play of the year, not just in the NBA, but across all of sport. It’s that good.

In other NBA news, our Bulls played considerably better than they have on their entire West road trip (they were 1-6 coming into Sunday night’s game) en route to a 116-103 win over the Suns last night. That core of the future - Kirk Heinrich, Ben Gordon, and Luol Deng - scored 29, 27, and 29 respectively. These guys are untouchable in any Gasol trade, if you ask me. Of course, John Paxson doesn’t.

Also, Kobe strong-armed LeBron and Co. last night for 36, but the Cavs came away with the 99-90 win. Oh, and D-Wade buried the Spurs in the 4th quarter. How’s that for leadership, Mr. Cuban? (I totally should have asked Cuban about this whole leadership thing when I had the chance.)

Oh, and Gil? I love you and all, but if you’re going to make ridiculous guarantees, at least get a fifth of the point total you promised. Yeesh.

A great deal of college basketball was played over the weekend as well, lest we forget. Let’s see if I can sum this up as concisely as possible: Duke sucks, Kentucky’s not enough, IU-Illinois is officially a rivalry, and Georgia Tech stays alive. That was actually kinda easy.

Oh, and thanks to those of you who either e-mailed or left a comment (I’m nodding in your direction, brosallman) about my LSAT Saturday morning. I feel pretty good about it. And after all, the test is mostly just logical reasoning, and I learned from the best:

I ain’t been rhymin like Common since
When your sense got that much in common
And you been hustlin since
Your inception
Fuck perception
Go with what makes sense

See? It’s easy!