Mariotti takes on the tough questions

September 14th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

You know, the really searing questions that no one else will answer, like Does everyone hate you because they’re jealous of your looks and impeccable writing style? and When did you first know you were “more famous” than anyone else? and What’s your favorite thing about yourself? No sighting of Why are you such a fuck? anywhere in there, but Who do you most identify with - George Orwell, William Shakespeare, or Ghandi? couldn’t have been far behind.

The good gentlemen at The Big Lead have already taken a look at this, but I’m less interested in the ridiculousness of Mariotti’s quotes in the profile and far more concerned with the writer of the piece, Dirk Johnson. See, Mr. Johnson demonstrates a knowledge of the reasons people dislike Mariotti - his petulant writing style, his limitless ego, his quasi-oppressed Jesus complex - but fails to really confront those issues, opting to let Jay imbue the piece with his views of why it’s everyone else’s fault no one wants to sit at his lunch table anymore.

To be fair, the story is relatively close to balanced. At most mentions of Mariotti’s “positives,” negatives are routinely trotted out. The problem, of course, is that Mariotti has no redeeming qualities, making the positives impossible to swallow. If you need an example, chomp on this beaut:

In his 15 years in Chicago, Mariotti - who lives in the north suburbs with his wife and two daughters - has proved himself one of the most prolific sports columnists in America. He writes a dizzying number of columns, upwards of 300 a year. He is so fiercely driven he will sometimes rip up a column between editions and start over. His columns can infuriate, but also sparkle, like fireworks with cinders that fall and burn wherever they land. It’s certainly no fun to be the object of Mariotti’s ire. But he can be a pleasure to read.

Beyond the brutal metaphor, let’s get serious. Mariotti’s columns are never a pleasure to read. He’s verbose, unprofessional, whiny, and what’s worse, he’s the greatest windsock show on Earth. Don’t believe me? Read this. His willingness to switch stances - not for the sake of accuracy, mind you, but in the hopes he can never be called blatantly wrong - is well documented.

In the end, the question Mr. Johnson is missing is a grand one, but one he needed to ask: As such a prominent sportswriter with such a wide realm of influence, what, if anything, have you done, Mr. Mariotti, to genuinely improve your profession?

There’s no doubt Jay would make up some sort of platitude to satisfy his ego for that one, but maybe, after the interview was over, just maybe, he’d go home, clank a few ice cubes into his tumbler, and take a long, slow look at what it is, exactly, he does for a living. And maybe, for only a few columns, Mariotti would try to remember why he decided to spend his life writing, and he’d realize what he’s been doing for a long time is not that at all, really. It’s food-fight instigation, at this point; of course no one wants to sit as his table anymore.

Case of the Mondays: Stumbling back in front of the keyboard

August 14th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

So you were out all night this weekend, guzzling sake in a brothel-like hibachi experience, randomly throwing together your friends and an equal number of all-too-ready soriority girls for what could have been a scene from any given episode of Entourage.

OK, so that wasn’t you; that was me. But never fear, because it’s Monday, and we’re back at the Postmen helm. Still hungover.

Were you out and about, you may have missed the White Sox’ sneaky sweep of the Tigers. Those Sox, seemingly doomed but a week ago, have taken back a big ol’ chunk of that AL Central lead. Jay Mariotti has once again fully graced the Sox bandwagon, which is becoming a bit of a yearly tradition.

Maybe you were feeling a little international this weekend. Hey, so was Randy Lerner! He completed his purchase of Aston Villa, a middling English Premier League club, for about 62.6 million pounds. Browns fans everywhere now have financial evidence that Lerner is only slightly concerned with their football team’s chances of improving in any sincere way, and more concerned with owning a lot of shit. Rad.

Also, mark your fantasy boards: Clinton Portis took a shoulder injury last night. (I believe Mark Schlereth would say he’s “got a shoulder.” Jerkoff.) Not good for Redskins fans, or for anyone who might’ve just drafted their fantasy team. Thank God my league waits until the last possible moment.

As R would say, Snoop Bloggy Blog:

MJD gives us the latest in Joe Buck-related news. Yes, you will get more Joe Buck. [TheMightyMJD]

Golden State of Mind chronicles the Donald Sterling housing discrimination mess. [Golden State of Mind]

EDSBS takes on Orlando Sentinel columnist Mike Bianchi. I didn’t know who Mike Bianchi was, exactly, but I enjoyed this nonetheless. [Every Day Should Be Saturday]

Since this happened, we should probably say something about it

June 27th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

College baseball. It doesn’t exactly get me all lathered up and ready to go, but it’s entertaining in very small doses, I suppose.Thus, I also suppose it necessary to briefly mention Oregon State’s win last night in the College World Series.

Confession: I did not watch a minute of the CWS. Not even the Championship game. Despite R’s solid list of reasons to watch yesterday, I just didn’t make it a priority.

I don’t know; I was out running errands, and then other stuff came on. I’m sorry. I got distracted. I feel ashamed.

Fortunately, I can redeem this post with the obligatory Beaver(s) joke. Ha. There it was. I hope you enjoyed it.

Actually, this whole not-watching-but-still-writing thing is weird. So this is how it feels to be Jay Mariotti.

Case of the Mondays : Without that movie, what would they say?

June 26th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

Bend it like Beckham! Beckham bends in lone goal for England! Bend! Bend! Bend!

Yep, this phraseology was all over the place yesterday on the Web and on TV. Despite puking all over the pitch, Beckham bent (we just had to) in a free kick just inside the left post which lead to a 1-0 win for England over Ecuador.

In other World Cup news, the referee of the Portugal-Netherlands game went a bit loco, issuing 16 yellow cards and four reds during the match. Hey, yet another sports match in which people will blame their squad’s loss on poor officiating instead of not getting the job done. Portugal won the match 1-0.

The White Sox nine-game winning streak finally came to a close last night, as they lost in 13 innings to the Astros 10-9. (Note to self: Don’t leave the Cell in the top of the eight when the Sox are down seven runs. You will miss Iguchi’s three-run homer and grand slam that tied up the game to send it into extras. Whoops.)

If you’re looking for an update on the lingering story that is Jay Mariotti and Ozzie Guillen, get at it here. (Jay made himself the story again!)

And for the record, I am in fact sitting in my underwear as I blog. Take that, traditional and professional media.

Weekend Fun: So, what else is there to do?

June 23rd, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

As I noted earlier today, this is one of the first ‘Weekend Fun’ posts we’ve ever had to make without mentioning the NBA playoffs. Fortunately, the NBA draft is nearly here, so you can spend some time this weekend thinking about that, if you’re so inclined. (We’d like to personally thank Isiah Thomas for the Bulls’ beneificial draft picks this year. Thanks, Ike.)

Also, the lack of basketball will certainly be accompanied by an increased interest in day-to-day baseball stuff - and not just Ozzie Guillen vs. Jay Mariotti nonsense (though Rick Morrissey writes a column worth reading today on the subject). Like, actual baseball. I might even start working through the Cubs media guide I was recently given. Exciting stuff, I know.

But, in the short term, the NBA’s lingering absence will no doubt be most effectively filled by the World Cup, which, despite a boring afternoon of action today, continues to entertain and surprise and destroy the spirits of men. Group of 16 action starts tomorrow afternoon with Germany v. Sweden at 11 and Argentina v. Mexico at 3. Sunday, the team I’m likely to root on now, England, will face Ecuador in the early match, and those pesky Polskis will take on their neighbors, the Netherlands.

R departs for Bloomington as we speak, signaling impending drunkenness. Enjoy your weekend as well, peeps. See you Monday.

Revisiting the Oswaldo Guillen Situation

June 22nd, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

So, this Ozzie Guillen f-word story (not the four letter one, the three letter one, silly) has become a big deal. (A bigger deal than even the mighty Ron Burgundy, in fact.) It’s all over ESPN, the radio, the blogosphere, you know; pretty much anywhere sports opinion disseminates from, you’ll find commentary on it.

Few quick things on it.

First, plain and simple, he shouldn’t have used that word. Even though he wasn’t targeting gay people, as he said, that word in today’s society has negative connotations. Sure, plenty of players and managers talk like this in the clubhouse, but to do it in front of a bunch of microphones, well that’s just plain stupid.

Second, as commenter Sam pointed out, as long as the White Sox are winning, Guillen’s outbursts will most likely continue to be tolerated by the club. It doesn’t seem like Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf came down on him too hard, only telling him he shouldn’t have used that word. The Chicago Sports Review has an excellent take on this situation, essentially saying he is ‘forfeiting his ability to ever manage a struggling baseball team’ because of his antics. I’m going to have to go ahead and agree with their take. If you have even a remote interest in this, I would suggest reading it. It’s one of the better written columns I’ve ever read, regardless of subject matter. (It makes mention of some scholarly book I’ve never heard of, but you don’t have to have read the said book to understand the concept the writer uses to illustrate his point in the column. Phew.)

And third, Mariotti still sucks. I’m glad Guillen is not backing down on that. But for as much as I applaud him for doing that, all he (and the entire White Sox organization, for that matter) are doing is fueling Mariotti’s ego, fame, fortune and essentially his ineptitude as a writer. Really, the best solution for Ozzie and the White Sox would be to just ignore Mariotti. Sox announcer Hawk Harrelson continues to bring up how he doesn’t like him. Everyone knows Reinsdorf and Mariotti have gotten into many feuds in the past. To continue to verbalize it only makes matters worse. Just ignore the dude.

Hell, we’re even contributing to his fame and fortune by posting about it right now. (Well, maybe.)

Oh, and if you need proof Mariotti is not good at what he does, here it is for you. (Again, I highly suggest you take a look at that.)

But all of this is neither here nor there. What’s really important is who would win in a fight between these two loudmouthed bravados. (This is an idea that’s been used on other sites and really since the dawn of mankind, or dinosaurkind, you choose. We’re not claiming to be revolutionaries or anything here with this idea.)

If we have 20 people vote on our poll, we’re claiming moral victory for ourselves. Get at it after the jump. (Height, weight, strengths and weaknesses included!)

CONTINUE READING THIS POST –>

Finally, a place where we can all go to collectively rip Jay Mariotti

May 24th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

We here at the Postmen (like both White Sox and Cubs organizations, sports bloggers everywhere and anyone who actually knows good writing/journalism) can’t stand Jay Mariotti’s columns in the Chicago Sun-Times.

He flip-flops more than John Kerry. He writes to get a rise out of people. He doesn’t do thorough research. And according to A.J. Pierzynski, he hasn’t been in the White Sox clubhouse since he’s been on the team.

Not to mention, we never agree with his stance on anything.

He, well, frankly, isn’t good at what he does.

But don’t fret, Mariotti haters. We now all have a blog on the interweb to read about all of Mariotti’s blunders – jaythejoke.com.

Here are a few choice cuts.

This is a classic example of something jaythejoke.com refers to as “The Mariotti Flip.” Two weeks ago the guy is lambasting Frank and praising Williams for getting rid of him. This week? He’s as happy as a schoolboy watching Frank hit dingers at the Cell and acting as if two home runs make Williams look like a fool.There is no consistancy from week to week. He simply picks something inflamatory, gets out his thesaurus and starts writing.

And in another post….

Today Jay showed that his computer has a thesaurus by using words like hubris and rancor in first sentence of his column. Unfortunately, anyone stupid enough to read this man’s column obviously has no idea what those words mean. Moving on.

We LOVE this site.

Badjocks.com - Much ado about nothing

May 18th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanE

This badjocks.com guy certainly knows how to make it big on the Web - celebrity photos! Well, except that the people in the photos he pulls up aren’t really celebrities. They’re college kids who happen to play a university-sponsored sport.

We’ve already touched on this, so I won’t dwell, but commenter Jason has a pretty good point about the irony in the entire situation here in an e-mail he sent to Badjocks peeps:

Dear idiots at Badjocks,
First of all, I belive searching for pictures of hazing incidents online is a weird habit to pick up. However, if that is what you losers do in your time, well that’s your prerogative. What I question is your numerous ads/links to DUI lawyers all over the country. What kind of message are you sending out about drunk driving? That it is a much better alternative to hazing incidents.During 2004, over 16,000 people were killed due to alcohol-related motor vehicle accidents (representing 39% of all traffic-related deaths). When it comes to hazing, 130 people had been injured or killed between the years of 1923-1980 (that’s 130 people in 57 years…a little over 2 a year). Although the numbers are up in the past 25 years, they don’t even come close to comparing to the number of alcohol-related traffic deaths. You idiots need to show some responsibility and get those ads off of your website. All it says it that you support drunk driving and that, in my opinion (and probably many others) is absolutely ridiculous. Enjoy your ad money…but honestly, I hope you choke on it.

It’s tough to argue with Jason on this one - this guy isn’t out to demonstrate the destructive (if you can call it that) nature of collegiate drinking and hazing practices. He’s just out to make a quick buck.

I wish the mainstream media - including Chicago’s king moron, Jay Marriotti - could recognize that.

Speaking of which, I also wish that idiots like Mariotti would realize a simple fact: hazing happens. If no one is hurt, either physically or emotionally, then it’s fine. Come off it, lad.

(Update homies: Check this link for a scathing essay on Bob Reno and why he’s a giant douche. Couldn’t have said it better myself.)

Does anyone like this Jay Mariotti guy?

April 6th, 2006 | Posted by PostmanR

Just picked up this interesting tidbit from the good folks over at Deadspin. Looks like Cubs president Andy MacPhail and White Sox chairman Jerry Reinsdorf co-authored a letter to the Chicago Sun-Times publisher John Cruickshank regarding the world’s most notorious columnist, Jay Mariotti.

Mr. Mariotti ripped Bud Selig’s supposed slow response to this whole steroid business in a recent column. MacPhail and Reinsdorf fired back saying that Mariotti ‘has made no effort to be the least bit informed on this important subject.’ And later, ‘If Mariotti would ever trouble himself to make a phone call, maybe he would get the story right.’

It may be a little difficult to side with MacPhail and Reinsdorf for defending baseball’s response to steroids, (and after reading their facts and evidence it’s pretty convincing the burden rested on the Player’s Association and not on Bud Selig) but either way, it’s nice to see the Cubs and Sox can at least agree on one thing – their hatred for Mr. Jay Mariotti.