Reality television reaches new pinnacle with Dallas Cowboys

May 21st, 2008 | Posted by PostmanR

Here is something I’ll never wrap my head around for men of my ilk — see: single, just out of college — why the eff don’t you know how to cook something? Why do you eat a bag of chips for dinner? Food is our very sustenance, it’s not really that hard to slap a good cut of meat on a pan with some seasoning, flip it over, take it off the flame and eat it. Add in some broccoli or spinach or something green on top of the meal for good measure and voila, it resembles something decent. And why wouldn’t you want to eat somewhat well every night? Something good and hearty? How many questions in a row can I ask? I don’t know? That shouldn’t have had a question mark after it? I can’t stop?

Anyways: the Cowboys are doing a cooking show. Via MSNBC and AA:

But in reality, the working title for a new television show scheduled to be filmed in Dallas is “Cooking with the All Pros.” Here’s the recipe: Grab some Dallas Cowboys. Toss in some contestants. Place them before television cameras and let them cook.

Dallas Cowboys tight end Jason Witten has tentatively agreed to approach teammates and former Cowboys standouts to appear on the new reality TV show, which will pair fans with players, and pit them against each other in cooking competitions, according to those involved in planning the show.

OMG MAYBE TONY ROMO WILL BE ON THEIR WITH JESSICA SIMPSON AND JOE HER DAD I LVOE THEM

Wade Phillips is having a tough day

January 14th, 2008 | Posted by PostmanE

As if yesterday’s loss wasn’t enough, poor Wade Phillips lost his keys after the game. Little did he know that was only the beginning of his troubles, troubles that would eventually include witnessing Jason Garrett’s death and apathetically accepting a Jerry Jones flavor infusion.

For the record, that second link is the culmination of a season’s worth of brilliant Jones-Phillips interaction. It’s been, as they say, WOOHOO, FUCKING CRAZY!!!!

Tom Brady, Bill Belichick are master linguists

October 16th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

As noted yesterday on many a blog channel, some guy who seemed to be transported from the Halcyon days of yore showed up Sunday in Dallas for the post-game presser and asked some ridiculously worded question to Tom Brady and Bill Belichick. (Apparently, it was some radio stunt. Which sort of ruins the whole thing.) But alas, here’s the Dreamboat and the Hooded Warlock’s exchange with this prospector:

And now for Belichick:

These Patriots, they do no wrong.