Who are these Magic dudes, and why don’t I know about them

July 7th, 2008 | Posted by PostmanE

Listening in to the streaming feed of the oh-so-important Bulls-Heat Summer League matchup has been revelatory, but not because of the basketball. The two dudes providing play-by-play have been everything I need in basketball commentary: laughter. I like to think I understand most of the major tenets of the game, so while I like to have Jeff Van Gundy’s brand of wisdom, I don’t need it. What I need are the following:

– Repeated references to how horrible Aaron Gray is. For example: “Aaron Gray makes a slow, awkward move. Not surprisingly, it’s rejected.”
– Being willing to admit that “Tyrus Thomas has been known to eat souls.”
– A dumbest email of the day feature. (For the record, the email asked if Dwyane Wade would get a lot of playing time next year. That is really dumb.)
– “Everything Joakim Noah does looks very awkward to me.”
– A debate on the merits of Kobe’s sneakers.
– “Jamesoff Curry.”

And so on. It’s brilliant stuff. I will struggle to justify watching the rest of Summer League, but Dante and Galante might do the trick. Whoever they are.