Miguel Batista, Kenny G, and God

February 28th, 2008 | Posted by PostmanE

I’m currently finishing up Sam Walker’s Fantasyland, which is as good a way to get pumped for a new season of fantasy baseball as any. In the book, one of Walker’s players — whom he determines to draft after meeting — is Miguel Batista. Batista, as Walker writes, is:

… undoubtedly one of baseball’s quirkiest players. He doesn’t hang his clothes in his locker; he folds them. He’s not a Nike or Reebok endorser; he likes Puma. He doesn’t just have three or four pitches, but somewhere in the neighborhood of fifteen, only a handful of which he can fully control. When I saw that Nando [his research assistant charged with finding funny anecdotes about players] had written, ‘Ask Batista about his novel,’ in the Toronto dossier, I had assumed he was messing around. But as I sat down with him in the clubhouse, I asked anyway.

“It’s a detective story,” he says.

After meeting Gilbert Arenas for the past few seasons, that doesn’t really seem very quirky at all. That seems more normal than quirky, but maybe for professional athletes normal is quirky. Still, when you add those traits with Batista’s desire to learn the soprano sax and his deification of Kenny G, “quirky” makes a little more sense:

The Mariners pitcher and blossoming soprano saxophone buff was invited to a concert at the Dodger Theatre in Phoenix on Tuesday, where he spent 20 minutes backstage with his musical idol, Seattle native Kenny G. They talked music, baseball and saxophone breathing techniques in a private waiting area before Batista was serenaded with his very own Kenny G session.”He played for me,” Batista said. “It was my favorite song, ‘Alone.’ Now, I feel like I’ve had everything. I’ve talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I’d be served. I’d be complete.”

Someday, Miguel, you will have an interview with God. He will question your music preferences and likely talk in incomprehensible hipster-speak like the people in “Juno.” Until then, though, Kenny G will have to do.