Dorenzo Hudson and the case of the projectile bile

February 21st, 2008 | Posted by PostmanE

I was all set to write about Shaq’s triumphant beginning with the Suns, but what is there to say? It was a fun game to watch — Pau Gasol is a sublime viewing pleasure — but it was only one game. Shaq looked out of whack. He showed promise — best to check in in a couple of weeks.

Instead, we turn our attention to far more amusing, albeit more disgusting, turn of events. The above video is Virginia Tech’s Dorenzo Hudson spitting bile, literally, all over the court. Fortunately, Dan Steinberg got the local color:

Others were more descriptive, and again, feel free to look away.

“I thought he got hit by a drink,” said Gary Harraka, also from the front row. “It just went squirting out. It was pretty disgusting.”

“He was going into his shirt, but it was still flying up,” said senior Greg Weller.

“He was holding his mouth and it sprayed up in the air,” said senior Dan O’Keefe.

“It sprayed at least two feet in the air,” agreed senior Clark Johnson.

The most surprising thing about all of this is how long the staff takes to clean it up. When I was in first grade, and this spaz named Brad projected his digested Halloween candy everywhere, all the janitor did was mop and drop some sawdust. Kids these days are spoiled.