Penn State linemen frighten me

November 15th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanE

As has (probably) been mentioned on this site before, I have a brief history of heavy eating. Normally, I am reasonable in my portions, but one day, on an escalating series of dares, I attempted to eat three burritos from Chipotle. I ate two and two-thirds burritos from Chipotle, and then promptly vomited two and two-thirds burritos from Chipotle. I failed.

A less notable failure that day, thanks to the lack of vomit, saw my roommate attempt to pack 20 Uncrustables into his smallish frame. He didn’t get anywhere close; smartly, he stopped at around eight, admitted defeat, kept himself from vomiting, and handed the rest of the Uncrustables out to the hungry crowd.

His defeat looks far more honorable today; a Penn State lineman, who probably weighs at least 200 pounds more than my roommate, puts down around 10 PB&J’s a day (HT: EDSBS)

Guard Rich Ohrnberger - the Lions’ unofficial comedian and eating statistician - has feasted with every lineman and claims to know who eats the most. According to the 6-foot-2, 289-pound redshirt junior, it is tackle Dennis Landolt.

“He probably eats more peanut-butter sandwiches than I previously thought was humanly possible,” Ohrnberger said. “He literally takes the cake.”

Guard Mike Lucian, a steady witness to Landolt’s eating exploits, corroborated that account.

“If you go in Dennis’ room there [are] loaves of whole wheat bread and jars of peanut butter,” Lucian said. “He eats at least seven to 10 [sandwiches] every night.”

OK, so that’s a lot of food, but what about in one sitting? Convince me that my 150-pound roommate doesn’t own you:

Ohrnberger “puts down more food than anybody, I think, and he struggles to keep his weight up,” the 6-2, 292-pound Lucian said. “Freshman year, he ate 10 sloppy joes one time. That’s the most I’ve seen.”

10 sloppy joes … OK, fine. Fine. You win, Penn State lineman. Fatty.