Hey old man, please leave this golf course

November 13th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

You know, when I get old, I am expecting certain liberties. For instance, I’ll be fine with it taking a whole two minutes to download a movie. Damn kids and their nanoseconds. And though I’m not quite the golf enthusiast at the moment, I would imagine as I progress toward the triple-digits of life, I will spend early Saturday mornings taking my time and enjoying a round of golf with fellow old men. We will talk about our bad hips or eyesight or something.

I just might not want to do that in the England.

Senior citizens who dedicate their retirement days to golf have been denounced as “leeches” on their clubs.

Many elderly players, who pay reduced fees, spend more than half their week playing, ruining courses and annoying younger members who often pay a lot more for membership, says The Golf Club Secretary Newsletter.

Now clubs are considering banning elderly players at certain times and dropping concessionary rates.

The suggestion will split opinion in the golfing world.

The monthly newsletter says that as life expectancy and fitness levels increase, older players are making greater use of memberships, playing two or three times a week. They spend so long on the course they become “leeches” on the club.

This is flat out age discrimination. To combat this gross intolerance, I suggest perhaps the greatest senior citizen ploy of all-time: I’M AN OLD MAN, I’M CONFUSED! Seems to work out rather well most of the time.

{Via Fark.}