Jury: Weis’ fault he’s such a fatty

July 24th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanE

Charlie Weis, abuser of belts and amplifier of attractive (not in a gay way!) quarterbacks everywhere, lost his lawsuit against two doctors he claimed botched his gastro-bypass surgery today. The jury deliberated for less than half the day. I’m not sure why this elicited a chuckle, but it did:

The doctor who performed the gastric bypass on Weis testified last week that the Type A NFL coach ignored his medical judgment in order to cram the risky operation into a timeline weeks shorter than is advisable.

I would say he pushed himself through it,” said Dr. Ferguson of Massachusetts General Hospital Weight Center.

Patriots quarterback Tom Brady attested to Weis’ disappointment over being unable to attend a preseason game.

“He’s always been an extremely intense person, an intense individual, an intense coach,” Brady said in the first trial. His testimony was read back to the jury last week by a stand-in - depriving the retrial of its star power.

Yes, intense, so intense he decided to have surgery to correct his weight instead of, you know, applying a little discipline when reaching for that fifth slice of Barnaby’s at 2 a.m. Such intensity of character! (Ah, fatness: the last socially acceptable prejudice.)

Asked whether he had updated his MySpace page accordingly, former quarterback Brady Quinn had no comment.