France hates Floyd Landis. Or not.

April 24th, 2007 | Posted by PostmanR

If there’s anything I know about our American sports heroes, it’s that when all else fails — literally, when the new set of tests on your urine fail — it’s, well, IT’S FRANCE’S FAULT!!!!

“First of all, I won the Tour fair and square,” Landis told reporters during a conference call on Monday. “I’m disappointed but not surprised about the leaks from the lab or from USADA to L’Equipe. It’s just another example that the very few rights the athlete has have been completely ignored by the anti-doping world specifically in regard to LNDD and USADA. We’re looking at potentially deliberate falsification of results and willful destruction of evidence which was one of our arguments against re-testing being done at the lab in question.”

At this point, I don’t really think anyone in America — save for hardcore cycling enthusiasts — cares all too much about whether or not Landis deliberately added some testosterone to his system. But, at this point, dude just give it up already. Save some face, buddy.

In any event, this sort of reminds me of the time my second grade teacher thought she caught me breaking all those windows with rocks. Just because she actually saw me throwing them doesn’t mean a damn thing. It was all Sarah’s fault! The power of the opposite sex possessed me!